In
today's world keeping Kesh (hair) has become an issue for some men and
women. However, our sisters struggle the hardest to maintain Sikhi
saroop in this western society whilst dealing with the images bombarded
by the media all around us of what an ideal woman should look like. No
longer is it seen natural to have hair on your arms and legs. I have
even heard non-Sikh young men saying it is disgusting to see men have
hair on their chest and arms, which I found shocking. People are
becoming more and more insecure about themselves, moving away from natural
beauty and inner grace and conforming to peer pressure, fashion fads and
idolising celebrities. For this reason it is an honour to see young men
and women keep their Kesh, shine in the glory of Guru Gobind Singh jee
and lead the world rather than follow the world.Bhenji Navrup Kaur jee from UK, a dedicated sevadaar who promotes Sikhi in local Gurmat classes and camps wrote an article about her personal story of keeping Kesh and dealing with excessive facial hair (which is a taboo subject). She has also held workshops on the issue of bibiaa and kesh.
Vaheguru Jee Ka Khalsa Vaheguru Jee Kee Fateh!
All
my life I was told that it was wrong to cut the kesh on my head, but the
kesh on my body – underarms, eyebrows, upper lip etc was okay in Sikhi.
I was SO paranoid of my kesh that I wasted thousands of pounds on hair
removal… for what? To be free. Thing is, I would get some sort of
expensive AND painful (I might add) hair removal treatment done and
would have this temporary feeling of beauty because one week later I
would start to see the kesh growing back.
I would hate myself and
think, why can’t I look like the women on TV. Then I heard of the
miracle treatment called Lazer hair removal. I was told that the kesh
would NEVER return… how amazing is this. So I went for a consultation in
Central London. I was told the kesh would never come back if I come for
a minimum of 6 treatments over 5 months. This would cost me about £600.
So I did it, and it was shocking that the kesh came back… I was so
disheartened but continued with the hope that one day the treatment may
work. Others that went with me for treatments (with not even close to
the amount of kesh I had) also found that the kesh kept returning. After
finishing university I really wanted to get into the film industry and
as a freelancer was not able to afford the treatments so I was waxing
and shaving my face instead. Vaheguru :(
In 2007 I went to
India. There my life changed and I made a commitment to walk the path of
Sikhi. I stopped meat, cigarettes, sharaab that very day but kesh… it
was too big a step to take. I tried to grow the kesh on my face but it
would hurt me to look in the mirror, plus friends and family would
harass me. I tried to be clever and bleach but a Gursikh (male) said to
me, don't do that – it looks worse. I got electrolysis done, and that was
really expensive. I felt it was working… and then surprise, surprise, the
kesh came back.
One day at a Gurmat camp, the question of kesh came up and a male gursikh said, "have you ever thought to yourself, that if it keeps growing that its meant to be there?" Vaheguru
it was so logically, what was I doing… Guru wanted me to look this way.
After that I let go and accepted myself. Months later, Guru blessed me
with His Amrit. It was at this point that I visited the doctor who said,"I think you have PCOS and I want to cure this naturally".
So
I was exercising 3 times a week, eating lots of fruit and veg and was
cutting out crisps, chocolates, cakes etc… within the space of 4 months, I
went from a size 16 to a size 12. My monthly cycle was somewhat normal, and the
kesh miraculously had thinned out so much that a fellow Gursikh
questioned if I had done something to my kesh. LOL!
After I had my
baby, my PCOS spiked again and the kesh came back, but now, I am onMetformin and regularly visit my doctor to keep an eye on the condition. This method is working.
I worked for 7 years in the film
industry. I sat across the table from movie stars and high level
executives, and I saw that they respect you more because you have the ability to
do what they cannot… be you! Be natural. Not be a slave to the outside
world's conditioned expectations of what is beautiful.
The important thing to
know is that the kesh is a part of who you are. Once you accept that, then
and only then, will you feel content within your own skin - then
everything will become easier. The hair removal adverts on TV use
language to enslave you, such as "Free yourself", "Discover your true
self"... I think to myself, they do not even know me. I am free... Why?
Because Vaheguru knows me... and He knows 'I'm Worth it!' (((:-)
TIP: Regularly
remind yourself of Great GurSikhs who obtained Shaheedi for Kesh...
Read and watch the films. Talk about it over and over with Sangat. This
will help to empower you! Also, if you are trying to keep kesh on a part
of your body and you fall, just keep trying... Never give up giving up! Remember, you are You!