Divorce and Re-marriage

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Divorce and Re-marriage

Post by Sevadar5 »

Waheguru Ji ka Khalsa ... Waheguruji ki Fateh

I am in my mid-40s and I have been separated for over 2 years, after a marriage that lasted 16 years. I have two kids in their early teens who live with me half the time.

Needless to say, the realisation of a broken marriage is painful and very disappointing. But I would like to move on and make the most of my remaining life. I seek advice if re-marriage in my circumstances would mean going against the “Sikh Maryada”?

I understand there is little or no reference about divorce & remarriage in Gurbani and are topics that are not openly discussed. I believe the rationale for this is that a marriage is a commitment that is expected to last a lifetime! But I am also aware that we as humans have to “accept” what life has in store for us. My dilemma is how can I seek direction from Gurbani if I were to consider re-marriage an option going forward.

This is an extract from SGPC on Sikh Code of Conduct and Conventions - “Generally, no Sikh should marry a second wife if the first wife is alive.” My interpretation of this code of conduct is to prohibit polygamy. Would I be going against the “Sikh Maryada”, given that my marriage would have failed to meet the Gurbani’s definition of a “true marriage”!

Thank you for going through my post and I look forward to hearing your thoughts.