Different Caste - what to do

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Different Caste - what to do

Postby Guest » Wed May 08, 2019 12:35 am

SSA everyone. I would like to start by saying this is an extremely difficult situation for me and I would appreciate honest feedback

So I am Ahluwalia, my girlfriend is Jatt
We are at the point we would like to pursue marriage however her father is very traditional and wants her to marry only a Jatt. He won’t even allow her to talk to males unless it’s work related. We both have good positions in the medical field and everyone besides the castes is great. My parents would have no problem. However she brought up the idea to her father about someone at work and her dad ended the conversation abruptly saying it would be dishonorably to his own parents if he let that happen. She did not have the courage to pursue further discourse. Is it better to end this relationship or would you suggest me being more aggressive and approaching her father. He seems to be very traditional and I don’t think I’ll be able to convince him to accept me. We have been together for 4 years.
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Re: Different Caste - what to do

Postby loveforsikhi » Wed May 15, 2019 3:42 pm

alpha2013 wrote:SSA everyone. I would like to start by saying this is an extremely difficult situation for me and I would appreciate honest feedback

So I am Ahluwalia, my girlfriend is Jatt
We are at the point we would like to pursue marriage however her father is very traditional and wants her to marry only a Jatt. He won’t even allow her to talk to males unless it’s work related. We both have good positions in the medical field and everyone besides the castes is great. My parents would have no problem. However she brought up the idea to her father about someone at work and her dad ended the conversation abruptly saying it would be dishonorably to his own parents if he let that happen. She did not have the courage to pursue further discourse. Is it better to end this relationship or would you suggest me being more aggressive and approaching her father. He seems to be very traditional and I don’t think I’ll be able to convince him to accept me. We have been together for 4 years.



How about if it was someone else who approached on your behalf as a vichola. If he is more traditional, it would be out of the realm for you to do it yourself. It would have to be either your parents, or a vichola. i think it would be troublesome for your parents to get tied into this. So i would personally choose someone else to try to set this up on your behalf. If youve spent 4 yrs together and love each other, fight for it, but i think you can be tactful in how to do so otherwise it would aggravate the situation for her at home !!
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Re: Different Caste - what to do

Postby 1jyot2moorti » Wed Aug 07, 2019 10:47 am

1. Tell her father to find out and merely quote the castes that Panj Pyaras were from.
2. Next, ask him if he sits in a pangat in langar (The visiting Emperor, Akbar was asked by Guru Amar Das ji to first partake langar amongst everybody before setting foot in the congregation, equality being foremost in Sikhism)

There is no room for casteism in Sikhi.
True Sikhs are righteously intolerant on that count.
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