how far is too far?

[-Kaur-]

wjkk, wjkf

I currently have someone in my life. not dating because we know having relationship before marriage is wrong. we are both 20 years old, and care for one another deeply, and both try to live as guruji wanted us too, but when your emotional feelings for someone are strong, sometimes naturally your physical feelings want to catch up. We dont want to have sex until after marriage. Though we hope this leads to marriage we are simply too young and anything could happen so we try and stay optimisic, this is what we both want. We also separated love and attatchment, we are not attatched to anyone but guru ji but we do have love for each other. As a sikh, as an amritdhari, is it wrong to hug, kiss, and be together in some physical ways if we dont physically have sex (as in intercourse) or is any physical relationship even if its kissing wrong?

[desi_kuri09]

SSA--

So you commented on my post & have read my story about my boyfriend and I. I am too fairly religious, and believe in waiting till after marriage for sex. I would never cross that line. However, it really depends on your own personal opinion. In my world and upbringing, I have had a large number of cousins/aunts/uncles who have had love marriages and have most likely had intimate relationships (meaning hugging, kissing, etc. no sex). I feel that it is hard to abstain completely from these physical acts, but if you and your partner are serious about it then you should talk and decide what you want to do. I am in a sticky situation but I love my boyfriend and we hug, kiss, hold hands, etc and I am willing to fight for him and he is willing to do the same for me.

On the other hand if you are amritdhari, it is a different story because you have made your promise to Babaji. Is your partner also amritdhari?

[indersingh1987]

For how long have you been knowing each other? If physical attachement is over-powering emotional attachement then you need to question whether it's love or just attraction? Love is eternal and attraction fades away with time .

[1sikh]

When you go too far only then you would realize it was too far and there is no way to go back. I always thought intimate relationships are better left for -after marriage.

Remember one thing: Every action has consequences; make sure you understand, well enough. Patience is a very important virtue.

WJKK, WJKF

[Heihachi07]

I can understand that it still hurts but yours is not a matter between you and the boy nor it sounds to be a love and betrayal type of situation.This is almost an arranged type of proposal for alliance which did not work for unknown (to me) reasons.

[Guest]

I personally think it is quite hard for anyone to avoid being physical with the partner. But, you have o stay in limits - this will not only lead to a happy and healthier life but will also help you in better upbringing of your children.

[Guest]

My mind is running on this issue every day. Could someone please help me with a practical solution to this ? What should I do ?