Sikh Temples view on mixed marriages
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Nihal Singh Kanakpuria
- Power User
- Posts: 745
- Joined: Wed Jun 11, 2008 9:17 am
Re: Sikh Temples view on mixed marriages
Sher Dil
[b]Its absurd, preposterous to push the blame of forced marriages, humiliation against women, honor killings, female infanticide to this clause of the Sikh Rehat Maryada.[/b]
This clause was most likely added so that a parents don't stray from their duty of finding a eligible groom (which is a very relevant duty of a parent, now days this is also undertaken by shaadi.com and sikhmatrimonial.com).
It may surprise you but many parents find a eligible bride for their son as well, so does it mean the guy has no choice ?
-Nihal
[b]Its absurd, preposterous to push the blame of forced marriages, humiliation against women, honor killings, female infanticide to this clause of the Sikh Rehat Maryada.[/b]
This clause was most likely added so that a parents don't stray from their duty of finding a eligible groom (which is a very relevant duty of a parent, now days this is also undertaken by shaadi.com and sikhmatrimonial.com).
It may surprise you but many parents find a eligible bride for their son as well, so does it mean the guy has no choice ?
-Nihal
Last edited by Moderator 1 on Tue Jun 19, 2012 11:53 am, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: Removed personal comments
Reason: Removed personal comments
Re: Sikh Temples view on mixed marriages
Moderator Note: The job of the moderators is to ensure that the discussion guidelines are followed. The discussion guidelines allow for all participants to express their opinion in a civil and courteous manner. We do not moderate peoples opinions. If any participant disagrees with something being said, they have the right to counter it in a civil and objective manner. Thanks.
I am not a very old member of this forum... but i wish to ask the moderators and members that do the members have a custom of ever apologising or moderators telling the members that their arguments are falling flat and .... where there is a time to put to stop....
or
egos rein supreme... ?????
Now see this Esteemed member(SHer Dil ) with 43 posts is submitting post after post without a single example from the SGGS or Sikh History and declaring indirectly everybody ( every Sikh ) a Male Chauvinist.. and even trying to find fault with sikh way of life...
Most shocking is the understanding of this member -i.e when the Sikh rehat Maryada gives directions to parents... about marrying their daughter....
I wish to ask dear member , What is the definition of parents ? .... every body will understand it includes Mother and father of the girl.... The mother of the giirl everywhere is as much in the decision making.... So how can you call the dictum of Rehat Maryada as Male Chauvinism??? Did the Rehat MAryada say the father of the girl will decide or the elder brother of the girl will decide.....
But I am very sure ... you will divert from this question.... and not answer as you have very conveniently avoided so many other statements of yours when pointed holes in them,,.... if you don't agree then go over your statements once again which have been pointed out please...
If you have any example from Sikh history of male chauvinism then support it or stop the unfounded arguments....
I am not a very old member of this forum... but i wish to ask the moderators and members that do the members have a custom of ever apologising or moderators telling the members that their arguments are falling flat and .... where there is a time to put to stop....
or
egos rein supreme... ?????
Now see this Esteemed member(SHer Dil ) with 43 posts is submitting post after post without a single example from the SGGS or Sikh History and declaring indirectly everybody ( every Sikh ) a Male Chauvinist.. and even trying to find fault with sikh way of life...
Most shocking is the understanding of this member -i.e when the Sikh rehat Maryada gives directions to parents... about marrying their daughter....
I wish to ask dear member , What is the definition of parents ? .... every body will understand it includes Mother and father of the girl.... The mother of the giirl everywhere is as much in the decision making.... So how can you call the dictum of Rehat Maryada as Male Chauvinism??? Did the Rehat MAryada say the father of the girl will decide or the elder brother of the girl will decide.....
But I am very sure ... you will divert from this question.... and not answer as you have very conveniently avoided so many other statements of yours when pointed holes in them,,.... if you don't agree then go over your statements once again which have been pointed out please...
If you have any example from Sikh history of male chauvinism then support it or stop the unfounded arguments....
Re: Sikh Temples view on mixed marriages
Nihal Singh,
Of course; according to the clause b and e, it is the duty of parents to make sure their daughter gets married to their own choice. You keep on supporting the same point I am trying raise and this is known as coercion.
Since it is a duty, it gives parents the right to force it on their daughter as well.
According to the Rehat Maryada, can the parents force their own choices of their daughter?
Yes, they can!
There is nothing is Rehat marayda written that enables Men to face the same degree of subjugation. Although, yes it true that parents are controlling and coercive over Men too in many cases however, it is still not to the same degree as they are allowed c to women both culturally and religiously.
It doesn’t take a genius to understand what’s happening in our society against women. A Sikh woman, who marries a non-Sikh or against the wishes of her parents is waiting to be banished, humiliated, ostracized and even killed in some cases which you are trying to allude. These issues are not directly related to Rehat Maryada but such practices enable an environment where the value of women is measured only in terms of how much can she submit to Men.
Of course; according to the clause b and e, it is the duty of parents to make sure their daughter gets married to their own choice. You keep on supporting the same point I am trying raise and this is known as coercion.
Since it is a duty, it gives parents the right to force it on their daughter as well.
According to the Rehat Maryada, can the parents force their own choices of their daughter?
Yes, they can!
There is nothing is Rehat marayda written that enables Men to face the same degree of subjugation. Although, yes it true that parents are controlling and coercive over Men too in many cases however, it is still not to the same degree as they are allowed c to women both culturally and religiously.
It doesn’t take a genius to understand what’s happening in our society against women. A Sikh woman, who marries a non-Sikh or against the wishes of her parents is waiting to be banished, humiliated, ostracized and even killed in some cases which you are trying to allude. These issues are not directly related to Rehat Maryada but such practices enable an environment where the value of women is measured only in terms of how much can she submit to Men.
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Nihal Singh Kanakpuria
- Power User
- Posts: 745
- Joined: Wed Jun 11, 2008 9:17 am
Re: Sikh Temples view on mixed marriages
Sher Dil,
The clause doesn't say get a girl married to a man of your own choice and force her, humiliate her if she doesn't agree, it just says get a girl married to a Sikh, its reminding parents of their duties towards their children.
If you want to know how a Sikh (the girls parents) should conduct themselves or live their personal life then pls refer to ' Sikh Personal Life' section of the Sikh Rehat Maryada .
It wont take a genius to understand that anyone killing, forcing, humiliating a girl is NOT living their life as per
"Leading life according to the Guru's teachings" as mentioned in the Sikh Rehat Maryada.
-Nihal
The clause doesn't say get a girl married to a man of your own choice and force her, humiliate her if she doesn't agree, it just says get a girl married to a Sikh, its reminding parents of their duties towards their children.
If you want to know how a Sikh (the girls parents) should conduct themselves or live their personal life then pls refer to ' Sikh Personal Life' section of the Sikh Rehat Maryada .
It wont take a genius to understand that anyone killing, forcing, humiliating a girl is NOT living their life as per
"Leading life according to the Guru's teachings" as mentioned in the Sikh Rehat Maryada.
-Nihal