Hard hitting talk that you will want to look at and contemplate:
The theme of this talk is the shabd 'Aye Mil Gursikh Aye Mil, Tu Mere Guru Ke Piare." The meaning of this shabd is:
"Come join with me, O Sikh of the Guru, come and join with me. You are my Guru's Beloved."
Bhai Harman starts the talk with two examples which demonstrate this value:
Bhai Randhir Singh used to have so much longing for his GurSikh siblings. When they would have a yearly gathering and it was time to leave Bhai Sahib would be found crying and using his own clothes to clean the shoes of the Beloveds of the Guru who were leaving. He would beg them not to leave. This is the Level of love a Sikh has for another Sikh.
Sant Singh Maskeen came out of a train at the station and one GurSikh ran and fell at his feet crying. Maskeen ji asked, "Why are you doing this?" and the Sikh responded, "In this city, I have not had the darshan of GurSikh for such a long time." These are beautiful examples of this shabd being applied in real life.
Then Bhai Harman went on to explain some examples of how a lot of us are not quite using this shabd in real life for the purpose of really illustrating where we are and where we want to go.
He points out that instead of valuing and Sikh of the Guru, today we have come to only like those Sikhs who's philosophy we agree with or who are in our own group. Other people we act suspicious towards them, "We don't treat them like the Guru Khalsa Panth. If we don't treat them like the Guru, than how do we expect to find the Guru inside that person?"
Another example is of Sant Giani Gurbachan Singh Ji Bhindravale. One time he was walking and he decided that he wanted to meet Nihang Singhs. As they were walking one of the Sikhs with him asked, "Giani ji, why do you want to meet the nihangs? They are dirty, they don't have any code of conduct for cleanliness!" Giani ji replied, "First tell me what the definition of a Nihang is." The Sikh said, "I don't know, please tell me ji." The answer came, "The meaning of 'Hang' is pride. A nihang is someone who doesn't have any pride or ego. We should all try to be a nihang!" If you have too much pride in your own philosophy, than you are not nihang.
Further if you look at the root of some of the different schools of Sikh thought, they start with historic figures like Baba Deep Singh ji and Bhai Mani Singh ji who were in the personal presence of Guru Gobind Singh. So it all comes back to our Guru father in the end. The Maha Purkhs, the great saints, among us, a lot of people feel they are different because they follow the unique philosophy of one such Maha Purkh. But the Maha Purkhs themselves doing feel they are as different, in fact they will participate in the same ceremonies together.
We do not want conversion or uniformity but we want unity. We want it among ourselves and with other religions as well. We want unity with Islam and Buddhism.... but at the moment we have not created unity with our own brothers in Sikh Dharma.
One teachings tells us that "When a Singh or a Kaur comes in front of you, victoriously give them the Wahiguru greeting."
This is the teaching yet a lot of the time we don't even acknowledge the presence of another beloved of the Guru, "Sometimes you look at someone so stuck in maryada, somebody so stuck in themselves, they can read bani for 4 hours. But then when they are finished with that 4 hours, they will spend the next 4 hours talking bad about other people. Then did they get anything from spending those hours in the gurdwara? What is the difference. Here in the gurdwara you came to fall at the feet of the GurSikhs."
This is why nowadays some people don't come to the gurdwara, they think, "What's the point, the only thing that happens is people fight all the time." When a committee is in power, than the followers of that committee attend gurdwara and the other half of the sangat doesn't show up. When the committee changes, the sangat who used to come don't show up and the others now do. This is not unity.
Bhai Harman explains that the gurdwara in which he is giving this talk opened in 1989 who came together to bless it's opening? It was three Sikh leaders from three different groups: Baba Maan Singh from Taksal, Bhai Jivan Singh from Akhand Kirtani Jatha, Baba Nihal Singh ji Nihang Jathedar of Tarna Dal, Yogi Bhajan ji from 3HO. When these GurSikhs came together all the different groups were together.
But today instead of just having different groups under different schools of thought, we have even more which are based on committees. In a gurdwara you will even find a group that owns the sheet seva and one that owns the langar seva. Sometimes there is even a fight over which sevadar can touch which plate (to wash it). It is like two brothers in the same house, under the same father, and they are always fighting. How can we then go out and inspire people outside of our house.
Gurbani also says, "Jo Deesai Gursikhra Tis Niv Niv Lago Pai Jio. AaKha Birtha Jia Ki Gur Sajan Deh Milay Jio" "When I see a Sikh of the Guru, I humbly bow and fall at his feet. I tell him the pain of my soul, and beg him to unite me with the Best Friend, the Guru. (Guru Arjun Dev Ang 763)"
How Sikhs speak with each other is with that trust that you can share with them the things you can't tell others, the deep feelings, the depression, the pain, what we're struggling with.
Conversely Bhai Harman talked with some sisters at the gurdwara who admitted, "I don't want to go to Sunday divaan because I know if I go I will be judged." Who is going to talk behind her back? Her own auntie ji's. People know if they confide something, it won't be treated with trust and the whole city will find out about it. Instead the kind of people we want to tell these important things to are those who will cause us to remember the Guru. This is why the shabd says, "Tu Mere Guru Ke Piare, you are be Guru's beloved."
Another example is Bhai Mardana with Guru Nanak Dev. Guru Nanak would be sitting on a elevated seat and Bhai Mardana would sit below on the ground. What did Guru Nanak do? Guru ji would grab Mardana and make him sit on the elevated platform saying, "You sit here, you are my brother, you are in my heart. There is no difference between us." Now Mardana is sitting with Guru Nanak and they are laughing together.
Another example of such love is between Sai Mian Mir and Guru Arjun Dev and even though they have a different Dharma Guru ji asked him to lay the first brick of HariMandir Sahib the golden temple.
Watch the video above to see the many other heart touching examples that Bhai Harman gives in a hard hitting talk with the sangat that needs self reflection in order to model the a true gurdwara, a true sangat and a true GurSikh is like.