The 'new' desi girl is here, don't mess with her

March 12th, 2009 by Shobhaa De Source: timesofindia.indiatimes.com

"Gender apartheid exists - go deal with it." Women are. Women will. The challenge lies in just two words - 'how' and 'when'. But there is no getting away from the fact that successive governments have wickedly and deliberately ensured women remain inside ghettos, invisible and silent, obedient and pliant. More than 60 years after Independence, 10 women are burnt every hour in our great country, according to the Lancet, a reputed British Medical journal.

How mahaan does that make us? Should we not be hanging our heads in shame? Why does nobody intervene? Why does society remain mum? Is it because we actually believe women's lives are worth nothing? That women are, in fact, dispensable? Burn one, get one free. Yes? The horrible answer may be just that. Despite these grisly statistics being available to us, we continue to pretend all is well in our society. Less than 9% of our women have a shot at higher education. Coincidence? Cultural bias? In this day and age?

It is astonishing what a depressingly low value we place on our women, after talking loftily about how Indian society reveres its womenfolk and worships them as devis! This is nothing but a smokescreen behind which we hide, deluding ourselves that beyond the beating and burning, lies a good heart that wants women to 'improve'. Well, guess what? The 'new', 'improved' woman has arrived. The miracle detergent worked! But she isn't what the client ordered.

This creature is a freak - she comes with a clever brain and she uses it to think! What's more, she believes in direct action! Toba. What are we going to do with this monster - the same one we created. Hopefully, we'll be able to subdue her - make her thanda. Teach her a lesson or two. It's easy. Just take the Bangalore/Mangalore model and adapt it to fit any city. All it needs are able-bodied men ready to pounce on defenceless women in public places. Not to worry. Nobody will interfere, not even other able-bodied men present there. The cops will look the other way, and refuse to register an FIR. Besides, how many of these women will dare speak up? So, go right ahead - rip their clothes, tear their hair, punch them. That's what they deserve. It's the only thing that will teach them a lesson. Really?

Not so. Take the 'Pink Chaddi' campaign. It may not have stopped further assaults, but it sure got women (and a few good men) together. These are the same women society feels so threatened by. But hey, they aren't going anywhere. If anything, their numbers are multiplying. One of the greatest heroes of our time, Ingrid Betancourt, stated during the Deauville Women's Forum, "I want to do things with freedom, to be on the side of truth and justice, no matter how hard it is." She was given a standing ovation by the other delegates, all 1,200 0f them from across the world. Another inspiring speaker, Irene Khan added, "If I were given a magic wand, I would replace our obsession with Dow Jones with an index of women's development." Imagine what the state of our Sensex would suggest about the status of our women at present! Tanking is too mild a term. But it is in precisely such a market that the best investment opportunities present themselves.

Disappointingly enough, with the elections round the corner, not a single political party has thought it important to address women's issues, forget reservations. It is as if women don't exist - not even as a vote bank. They are making a huge mistake. A society that marginalises its female population is a society in decline. Domestic violence remains India's best kept dirty secret. Not a single politician has recognised its devastating effects on society at large. So long as our women continue to be traded, brutalised and ignored, India cannot call itself a great country, even less a great civilisation. Mayawatis and others like her, may come and go. But even she has ignored her own kind. As have Sonia Gandhi and Pratibha Patil. The 'new', 'improved' desi girl has decided she isn't going to wait for any of them to help her. The change is here. And the change is her. Maa di laadli bigad gayi...! Mind it!

Oh, Happy Women's Day!

Comments

Romesh Kumar

Dear Romesh & Anand ji I request you to not to indulge in abusive language rather discuss with logic. Romesh ji tell me one thing what will you say to leader of your religion who betray your religion ? I feel there are very good persons in every religion and I have full regard to all those people and my friends of other religion. But opinion about Mr Badal is not same. I hope you should not have mind. Further fanatics hindu's in UP use to call Mr Mulayam Singh Yadav as Moulana Mulayam Singh Yadav. Any how Please be good human, by abausing you are not going to get any thing. Thank S S Akal

human ji and all members...,

human ji and all members..., everything is here on record. Please do check all the posts of past 12 weeks on various subjects under different articles on different pages and find out who started it. Endurance and tolerance has a limit. These two members have nothing to present or table except racist remarks, abusive language and calling names. Is he not the same satnam who called PCJ... phukra chuhra jahil. It was and is my last attempt to make them realize of what does an abuse and racist remark mean. Otherwise sometimes one has to change the strategy to deal with idiots like satnam and nimanna are. Another false accusation these bhekhadharis under the guise of a sikh are leveling, is badmouthing of Gurus !!!!!! Please go through whole of the site and find one word, line or post which supports the accusation. Both of them are idiots and liars like wicked politicians. Please find the facts and figures and beware of these two pretenders. I seriosly doubt their sikh identity. satnam seems to be from anti-sikh cults within sikhism and nimanna is beyond doubt a paki/indian punjabi muslim SSA.

Human Ji, I appreciate your

Human Ji, I appreciate your concern about the abusive language being used by participants on this web site but am disappointed to note that you have named me as one of the abusers. First of all I would request you to please address me as Satnam Singh, ( Satnam_anand) is only my login ID). Please check all my comments/replies to Mr. Romesh Kr. and see for yourself that I have not abused him in any of my posts. I have only capared his thought process and cunningness with that of a clever Brahmin but look how derogatory language he uses when he is cornered, not just with me but with others too, (here is a latest example):nimaana new Submitted by Romesh Kumar on Sat, 03/14/2009 - 13:17. nimaana khan.................................." tenu kal bhi dasya si ke je teri maan naal hindu te sikh fauzian ne balatkar kita hoya tan o mera jan baki bandyan da kasoor nahi. ja ke phad unhanu. tenu te tere jehe bandyan nu ehi maan bhen di boli samajh andi tan meinu bi bolni he peini, wazir khan di najayaj aulad. Pehlan dekh e gandgi kin pani shuru kiti si sikhnet ch ? idan di boli kin pehlan boli ? mein teri te tere jahe bandyan di maan-bhen ik karda e rahanga jad tak tu chahunda."

Real irony and tragedy

Once again, I am left wondering why this story in on Sikhnet? What does it have to do with Sikhi? Besides, the thrust of the story is misplaced. Women aren't going to gain their due rights by reacting to radical outfits like SRS with Pink Chaddi campaigns. I see Pink Chaddi campaign as a stupid reaction to a stupid action. All the excitement over celebrating Valentine's Day as "Lovers' Day" is fraught with confusion as well. In Christian tradition, this day was observed as a day to honor several "saints" named Valentine who were killed under Roman persecution. A prominent one of them was killed on February 14th, 270 AD and the Church started observing the "Day of Valentienes". This observance had no romantic elements for the next ten centuries. It was during the 14th century when European lords and kings started giving it a romantic hue with their extravagance. And the commercial interests started exploiting this day during early 1900s. And now the same commercial thrust and Western influence has pushed this day to other parts of the world. So here we are, getting too excited over "celebrating" a day without knowing its history. I am all for equality of genders but my sisters shouldn't use stunts like "Pink Chaddi" to bring attention to the issue of women's rights. They need to understand their own heritage and demand equal rights based on their own ethos. Picking a fight over "celebrating" Valentine's Day is simply ironic and tragic.

Nihal Singh ji

I fully agree with content of your letter but I want to condem people belonging to these moral police who themself have no moral. Non of these moral police want to join army and go to border to serve country neither they are prepare to go to remote area of country where hundreds of people does not have education and health facility they will go there only after foreigne machinery open school hospital and church there, that too to destroy all this.

Gender apartheid exists even in sikhs

We should also put SGPC name on it and send it to Amritsar. Women are treated as untouchable at Harminder Sahib as they are not allowed to do seva and do kirtan. Let us clean our house first and then go after others. Just my thoughts.

Just sikh
See the brotherhood of all mankind as the highest order of Yogis; conquer your own mind, and conquer the world.

Just Sikh, Not a bad idea

Just Sikh, Not a bad idea but will it have any the desired effect on the thick skinned SGPC, its iliterate (paid )Jadthedars and its Boss Parkash Chand Badal.

Uf Uf Mirchi

Romesh Kr., I hope your family including your wife, mother, young daughters and kids also read the kind of language you use. BTW being a staunch Hindu Brahmin what the bloody hell are you supposed to be doing here on a SIKH web site? First of all you badmouth REHAT MARYADA, then you find faults with AMRITDHARI SINGHS, then you advise Sikhs to take (venom spewing) Hindus like you in SIKHI FOLD TO INCREASE THE NUMBER OF SIKHS, if you change your name to ROMESH KUMAR SINGH ( even though you will not stop cutting your hair). WHEN I STAND UP AGAINST THIS SAYING THAT SIKHI IS NOT ABOUT QUANTITY IT IS ABOUT QUALITY AND OPPOSE YOUR SINISTER MOVES(which are like those of a clever Brahmin) you start calling names. THIS IS NOT FAIR MR. ROMESH KUMAR. I HEREBY CAUTION YOU TO BE CAREFUL WITH YOUR WORDS. ALSO THE LALA/BRAHMIN CHAAL OF DIVIDING JATS AND OTHERS HAS OUTLIVED ITS UTILITY SO THINK OF SOMETHING ELSE FOR YOUR SURVIVAL. CALL IT A DAY MR. ROMESH KUMAR, LOMBRI LIKE YOU HAS NO PLACE AMONGEST THE LIONS.

apni dukan kite hor chala

apni dukan kite hor chala oye gaddara hun. tere jahe jaali te kagzi sher hawa naal ud jande te ud-de dekhe ne asin. bhekhadhari ei tu gandi naali da keera. saare message dekh pehlan pher mainu dus a language kine shuru kiti, pher kinni der mei sehan kiti....hun mirchi tenu te nimanne khan nu laggi ei. hun samajh ayi ke language ki hundi ei ?????

MIRCHI

Romesh Kr., You may spend the rest of five/ten years of your remaining life trying your level best to project Sikhs,Sikhism and Sikh Gurus in a poor light, but as long as I am alive I will not tolerate a single word against Sikhs, Sikhi or Sikh Gurus. Specially not from you. Don't try to act innocent now, THE CAT IS ALREADY OUT OF THE BAG, people who have been following your comments don't need to be told anything about you or your Brahminical Thoughts and for others and for you I have all your messages saved date wise. DON'T YOU REALIZE YOU DON'T BELONG HERE---SHO, SHO, PLEASE GO AWAY.

satnam..., come out of

satnam..., come out of lunatic asylum of fanatics and start thinking positive for your brighter future. Do not worry about me. I have spent life like a life as a normal human being. You and your like-minded people do not mean and matter in civilised world. They are disgrace to the religion/faith they belong to.

You wake up from your slumber.

Romesh Kr., I have lived my life to the fullest by grace of my Guru and by his Kirpa the rest of my life I will spend in trying to ward off unsrupulous people from coming anywhere near Sikhism. Please stop worrying about my or my religion's future. LET ME TELL YOU NORMAL PEOPLE DON'T INTERFERE IN OTHERS' AFFAIRS, THEY DON'T ACT MEAN OR CALL NAMES, THEY DON'T ABUSE ANYBODY WITHOUT ANY PROVOCATION . Now a piece of advice for you; 1. Don't interefere in our affairs for God sake. (Punjabi wich; Sikhan naal panga nahi changa)>>2. Don't give unsolicited advice to anybody, not even your own grown up children, leave alone 'NEXT DOOR WALA'>>>3. Always remember Sikhs cannot tolerate insults or bad mouthing of their religion or their Gurus.>>>>4. Your sarcastic and taunting language is going to land you in deep shit one day, so learn to mind your language.>> I am very happy in the 'sharan' of my Guru, in the condition he has kept me. I request you to end this here by keeping away from our affairs as they do not concern you at all and please learn to be happy as a true Hindu with your Hindu fraternity and try to keep your own religious affairs and matters in order. Best of Luck for BEING. A GOOD HINDU.

apni dukan kite hor chala

apni dukan kite hor chala oye gaddara hun. tere jahe jaali te kagzi sher hawa naal ud jande te ud-de dekhe ne asin. bhekhadhari ei tu gandi naali da keera.

True......still.............

One way to encourage is to be polite n other is to be aggressive, you choose the 2nd one. May be its because you really thought this might help or it would have. But after reading it i got 1st the society view and 2nd how can you break that view. You started with 'how' and 'when' but i want to ask you 'why' this image has come up. 'why' women are still not allowed to do things their way and so on... But on the other hand i feel who stops them to do it, if someone stops then again 'why'. We need to find 'why' we are still unable to change the thinking of our society towards strength of a women. If Almighty has given her the power to sustain another life in her then she is not just a species who needs to be destroyed. She is next to God.And God is never aggressive(gurbani says "to be polite and modest are biggest virtues of goodness) . But other view i can add is that women wants to match their steps with men, true , they should but also they should be prepared for good n bad both. "People get misused because they make themselves do that", If we are balanced enough then no one can abuse us. In the end God has made women as a model of love , care and softness, you know why?? because God also loves, cares and never hates, same as i mentioned above. Now if we want go against God's will, its your choice. Try to solve things in your way(soft way), rather than copying the hard way(like men do). I tried to put in my views as per my little knowledge. God bless you "If i stop learning....I cease to be a Sikh..."

One of the best article i ever read !!!!!

last week i had seen one guy of Bajrang Dal tried to teach some cultural lesson to Girls at North campus However at the same time beaten by Girls of Khalsa colleage at North Campus New delhi ,i was watching that Drama and Njoying at the same moment, ha ha ha ha ha ha Thats was the moment of my lifetime but again No FIR was registered against that guy there was a verbal compromise at the end !!!!

When did Valentine's Day turn into freedom for women?

Bhainji, Stop watching Bollywood and Hollywood movies. They are the problem. And, I do have problem with your article because I think it is very biased against one culture and society. Many of things are true about Indian society's historical treatment of women and on going discrimination and biases on many fronts. But I don't think this article is the way to solve these problems. First of all, it generalizes about all Indian men. Secondly, when did being vulgar, unmodest, disrespectful, cheap sex symbol for men translate into freedom for women? I think the Valentines day is mostly about sexual exploitation of women and less about romance and love and all. All this romance crap is overated to show sexuality. Look at the cheerleaders, T.V. ads, western shows, strip clubs, bars in Western society. They are nothing more than a sexual exploitation of women. Bollywood movies are doing the same thing. These Hindi quotes used in the article don't apply to all men and women and every household. I wish women all of the happiness, success, peace, freedom, equality in life. Gurbani really shows women the true freedom. I wish my daughter would become a leader one day, be happy, peaceful and successful in life no matter what she decides to do. and, I just hope she doesn't think in her mind that Valentines day undies, vulgar unmodest translate into freedom for her.

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