Marrying a Hindu punjabi boy is crime for sikh girl??

[Romesh Kumar]

Mrs. Panjaban Ji,
This is all because of His special grace to the special people who trust in Him.

I wish you long and happy married life.

SSA

[harinder1827]

Waheguru ji ka khalsa Waheguru ji ki fateh

My cousin did the same ..... the thing is the identity given to us by Guru Gobind Singh Ji is disappearing but on the other hand i am proud of white americans who have adopted Sikhism with whole heart and give us so much inspiration that there is so much into sikhi because this religion is TRUTH .....without KHALSA you cannot escape from the jaws of death even if you die because you will be trapped again in the cycle of death....hinduism worship idols and if you go deep down in your heart ....guru taught us that we cannot define the almighty lord ...m not preaching hate but just want the world to know the truth ...even if you are a hindu.. meditate ram within because everyone is equal and this is what sikhi teaches....the reason why sikhs were told to keep hair was because when you meditate the lords name ....each hair of your body prays along with you and a frequency flows through your hair which keeps you connected to waheguru when you do simran with full concentration and guru gobind singh ji sacrificed his family (Sarbans Daan) so that people knows the truth... When Guru Nanak Dev ji came to earth....some were hindus...some were muslims ...christians....so and so but the people who saw the truth became sikhs....learners ....so advise to you is realize the truth and make others realize too.....wish you very best for your life and i hope your kids will realize the TRUTH

Waheguru ji ka khalsa waheguru ji ki fateh

[swarn bains]

you did no wrong marrying a hindu boy.

[crowbarred]

personally I think its the sikh women who are contributing to the downfall of sikh-ism..

almost ALL ( of around 30 ) sikh women that I know have married hindu guys over the past few years.. and adopted hindu customs..

its a tragic shame that sikh men are made to bear the flag of sikh-ism while the women are lured by the sway of desire..

I came across this article by chance and couldnt help commenting..

[Nihal Singh Kanakpuria]

I agree with you crowbarred ,

Its ironic as they are the same women folk that Guru Nanak appreciated when the world considered them second class citizen. He advocated equality for women when they were nothing more than a disposable household item.

Sometimes I do think if the current Sikh women folk can even apprehend the part they are playing in dissolving a faith that was pioneer in advocating equality to a simple average women, without making her a goodness of wealth or anything else that man could exploit.

-Nihal

[Guest]

Hi Im Jane 29.Im a Filipina a catholic. I fell inlove with a Sikh guy our relationship was almost 3years now and we had a daughter. My Family knows about but his family not at all . It really hurts me alot though i love him that much and I know he loves me too but he doesnt have a courage to tell his family about our relationship and importantly about us having a daughter. He said he cant do it beacuse his family is goin to get mad at him because he said he can have a relationship with a non sikh. Last week I found out that he was deciding to leave me and my daughter because he said he needs to go back to India with his family and might get married once his parents find a match for him. I was in the dark now each day I was afraid that he's goin to leave anytime soon. He doesnt even want to tell me when he is leaving. PLease i need some advice I dont know what to do. Can I just let him go and move on with our daughter or fight for our love? I was thinking If Im the one who's goin to tell his family about us but im afraid too he might get very angry with me and im so scared to lose him I love him so much.

[loveforsikhi]

Hi Im Jane 29.Im a Filipina a catholic. I fell inlove with a Sikh guy our relationship was almost 3years now and we had a daughter. My Family knows about but his family not at all . It really hurts me alot though i love him that much and I know he loves me too but he doesnt have a courage to tell his family about our relationship and importantly about us having a daughter. He said he cant do it beacuse his family is goin to get mad at him because he said he can have a relationship with a non sikh. Last week I found out that he was deciding to leave me and my daughter because he said he needs to go back to India with his family and might get married once his parents find a match for him. I was in the dark now each day I was afraid that he's goin to leave anytime soon. He doesnt even want to tell me when he is leaving. PLease i need some advice I dont know what to do. Can I just let him go and move on with our daughter or fight for our love? I was thinking If Im the one who's goin to tell his family about us but im afraid too he might get very angry with me and im so scared to lose him I love him so much.

Jane, I’m so sorry you are stuck in this situation. And your little girl. That’s the LEAST he can do. Okay so let’s look at your options:

#1
The first thing you can do is encourage him to tell his family. I’m sure you’ve tried this. (This is not mutually exclusive from the other options. Basically you can encourage him and then if he doesn’t follow through go and tell his family, etc.). Tell him that a Sikh is a person who is brave and courageous and does the right thing. That’s not abandoning your partner and child just because you are afraid of speaking the truth. Truthful living is Sikhism. I think you should tell him at least he owes it to your relationship to be honest enough to tell you when he is leaving to have a proper goodbye. So what if his family is going to get mad? That’s a temporary emotion and its in response to the truth. They will be mad he lied and didn’t tell them he has a daughter. But that’s their grandchild.
PROs: it doesn’t involve you having to tell his family. at least you are fighting for your relationship. If he follows through, his family knows about you and your daughter.
CONs: He probably won’t follow-through because of fear of his parents. He may get annoyed?

#2
Tell him he doesn’t have to tell his family about you, but he should stay in this relationship and shouldn’t leave you to go get married. (He can just tell them he isn’t interested in getting married).
PROs: he doesn’t have to tell his family everything
CONs: involves him telling his parents he isn’t going to india because he needs a reason why he isn’t going. His parents still don’t know about you or your daughter. Just delays things for a while

#3
Threaten to tell his family. Then if he doesn’t, tell them yourself.
PROs: at least you gave him a chance to do it himself first and you explicitly told him that (altho he has had a chance to tell them himself all this time and he didn’t do it); his parents know about you and your daughter so he can’t ignore reality and the truth; makes it harder for him to justify going to india and getting married because the reason for doing that is them not knowing; you are fighting for your relationship
His parents may then change their mind about him getting married in India and make him be responsible for his partner/child here. They may welcome you into their family. It depends on how open-minded they are. It may take them some time to adjust to the idea and then they do that. (Best case-scenario for this)
He may be relieved now that his secret it out and there’s nothing he can do about it.
CONS: His parents will very likely be angry (at him for not telling the truth) and it could be misdirected at you. They may tell him to have nothing to do with you anyways and go to get married in India regardless. (Note here. Even if his family is angry, and I probably would be if my son lied and didn’t tell me I have a grandchild, they now know the truth and they can’t ignore it. They said he can’t have a relationship with a non-sikh but he did. Period. Often times people change their mind when they find out its done, its over, its not about what’s an “Expectation” anymore, its about the reality. He wasn’t supposed to have a relationship with a non-sikh according to his family’s values, but he did. And they cant’ change that.)
He may be angry. (Note here. He may be angry at you for telling the truth. But it’s the reality. Then he theoretically should be with you. Because he has no excuses. His excuse for leaving you was that he didn’t tell his parents. Now – in this scenario- his parents know, he has no reason to leave you. Say he gets angry and says well now I don’t want anything to do with you because you told them and I’m going to india to get married. Well he is headed out there to do that right now! He is just using the excuse that he is angry at you. But in reality ,he is leaving you anyways so its not about you. I don’t know if it makes sense to you but him getting angry in response to your telling his parents doesn’t create any more problems for you than already exist. The worst case would be that he is angry and he leaves to get married in india. He is already leaving to get married.)

#4
Tell his family yourself without telling him you are going to do it. (of course the direct thing to do is go tell them. the sneaky thing to do is go drop off some pictures of him and you and your daughter in their mailbox at their house with possibly a letter explaining. Either way they know, but it depends on whether you are willing to have that conversation with them directly. And if u send a letter or pics u may never know what came of it or what happened. If you talk directly at least u see their response.)
PROs: his parents know about you and your daughter so he can’t ignore reality and the truth; makes it harder for him to justify going to india and getting married because the reason for doing that is them not knowing; you are fighting for your relationship
His parents may then change their mind about him getting married in India and make him be responsible for his partner/child here. They may welcome you into their family. It depends on how open-minded they are. It may take them some time to adjust to the idea and then they do that. (Best case-scenario for this)
He may be relieved now that his secret it out and there’s nothing he can do about it.
CONs:
His parents will very likely be angry (at him for not telling the truth) and it could be misdirected at you. They may tell him to have nothing to do with you anyways and go to get married in India regardless.
He will be angry at the ruined relationship with his parents.
#5
Let him go. Personally I would feel I would need to do as much as I possibly could to save my relationship, at least for your daughter’s sake but here are the pros and cons regardless.
PRO: you don’t have to do the work of convincing him or talking to his parents
CON: he leaves for sure.

I’m not judging any of these options, you have to make a decision for yourself and add pros and cons as you see fit. But I hope this gives you a starting point to realize the potential effects of what happens.

[Romesh Kumar]

Hi Im Jane 29.Im a Filipina a catholic. I fell inlove with a Sikh guy our relationship was almost 3years now and we had a daughter. My Family knows about but his family not at all . It really hurts me alot though i love him that much and I know he loves me too but he doesnt have a courage to tell his family about our relationship and importantly about us having a daughter. He said he cant do it beacuse his family is goin to get mad at him because he said he can have a relationship with a non sikh. Last week I found out that he was deciding to leave me and my daughter because he said he needs to go back to India with his family and might get married once his parents find a match for him. I was in the dark now each day I was afraid that he's goin to leave anytime soon. He doesnt even want to tell me when he is leaving. PLease i need some advice I dont know what to do. Can I just let him go and move on with our daughter or fight for our love? I was thinking If Im the one who's goin to tell his family about us but im afraid too he might get very angry with me and im so scared to lose him I love him so much.

Really sorry to know.
I am not talking about a man of particular religion in your particular case.
‘Most’ (if not all) of the Indian males regardless of their religious, ethnic and regional background, use this tactic of ‘Indian Culture’ to betray and deceive non-Indian girls abroad.
This ‘Indian Culture’ tactic works and those innocent and clean-hearted non-Indian females like you, start ‘sympathizing’ with person/s who is deceiving her in a well planned way, exploiting her culture, feelings and sentiments.
They do that after having a nice time with those girls without even thinking of future of those non-Indian females.
Please be advised and informed that if Indian Culture does not allow marriage like this, same Indian Culture also not allows to have sex with a female [pre-marital sex], male is not married to.
As you already have a child out of this relationship, that man is your lawful husband in Indian laws and culture and, in Indian law he cannot marry again unless he is a formal divorce from you.
You need to consult your local lawyer what law of your land says about it. You need to stand up and fight for your legal and human right.
I wish you all the best.

[Guest]

Thank you loveforsikhi im still cant decide. I really want to tell his family but im so afraid that he will leave me and our daughter very soon if i will do it. He will leave us without even saying goodbye and hated me because i told his family about us. :'(

[Singh2000]

Waheguru ji ka khalsa Waheguru ji ki fateh

Jane29: If all above options fail, Let you boy friend/husband know you will take help of lawyer and police. So that he will think 10 times before taking any step.

God bless you.