A Girl loves me

[Verloren]

Hi there,
I would love to get some suggestions from someone who might have faced the same kind of issue. We are friends from last 4 years and we use to talk on and off but few months ago we started to meet a bit often and last year she proposed me for marriage, however I said no coz I never saw her as my life partner but only as my friend. keeping long story short, we meet in Jan and I was dropping her at her place in the evening and before going she hugged me very tightly and said that she loves me very much. At that moment I just didn't had the heart to tell her that I don't love her coz last time when I said it, she nearly went into depression. After that we didn't spoke until this month and I called her up just to check how she was doing? So, few days back we met and again we hugged each other but this time it went a bit further. Now my dilemmas are:

A. I had already told her that we can't get married but still she says she loves me, i mean the whole world to her and she will do everything that please me and a whole lot of other stuff. I don't want to break her heart because I think it will come back to me. I've made it clear that we can't have a future but she says live at present and don't worry about the future. Should I tell her that we can't get married because I don't see you that way and we come from different background and stop talking to her?

B. Should I also live in the present and allow the situations take control over decisions?

A quick reply will really help...

Thanks,
Verloren

[missnewyork]

Hi Verloren,

I think you should give her at least one chance. You never know what tomorrow may bring for both of you.

Best,
Kaur

[suji singh]

Brief answer: If you cannot have a future with her, you should make a clean break right now vs. hurting her in the future.

Discussion: True love is hard to find. You may never find one again. It appears that she loves you profoundly and deeply, you should revise your stand and make a firm commitment. By making a contact after a hiatus, you reignited old flames and expectations. This was a mistake if you are firm on not having a future with her. Hoping you did not impregnate her; when you have physical relationship as you described, you are committed accept it or not.