Falling out with parents

Family, love, marriage, children and the relationship of ourselves to our own soul and to the Guru

Falling out with parents

Postby Guest » Sun Feb 10, 2013 1:10 am

WJKK WJKF, I am a 21 year old third year university student. My parents have gotten into Sikhi a few years ago. I was in middle school at the time. Anyway, I have never been very religious and always been rebellious. I'm at the point in time where I can no longer handle restrictions being made in the name of religion. For starters, I was literally told to choose between cutting my hair or living at home at the age of 14. Clearly, I made the wise decision of staying at home. I was no longer allowed to eat meat or enjoy my favourite burger. After much rebellion I was finally allowed to get my eyebrows done in grade twelve. Fast forward to third year, I'm not allowed to go out past 9pm, not allowed to wear knees length garments without tights, still dealing with the hair/meat issue, not allowed to date, not allowed tank tops or shorts. I'm not allowed to attend any parties without my parents. Going to my friends houses who are not Sikh is out of the question. I am HIGHLY frustrated to the point of where sometimes I feel like giving up and killing myself. I find love for Sikhi and its driven away by my parents bogus rules. My social life is suffering, my grades are suffering and I just feel like a failure. They talk about oppressed Muslim girls but honestly I have stricter rules to follow. I do not want to be amritdhari like my parents and because of their rules, I don't think I want anything to do with amritdhari people in general. They call me a slut, a disgrace. I don't drink, smoke or go out and have sex. Am I the only one who sees the entire situation as stupid? Forgive me for my horrible grammar.
User avatar

Re: Falling out with parents

Postby Romesh Kumar » Sun Feb 10, 2013 9:55 am

Confused92 wrote:They call me a slut, a disgrace. I don't drink, smoke or go out and have sex. Am I the only one who sees the entire situation as stupid? Forgive me for my horrible grammar.

If you are living in western countries then you should go to nearest police station and report the matter in depth and details.
You can equally seek the help of a lawyer who can further connect you to Home or Immigration dptt or some nearest human rights or child-care organisation/s to intervene.

If you are living in Punjab then I am really sorry, can not say anything except to endure it and submit yourself to the circumstances (or your life will be endangered).

If you are living in any of the remaining other states of India then report the matter to your school/college authorities who will advise what to do next.

I wish you all the best and peace of mind.
User avatar
Romesh Kumar
Power User
Posts: 1062
Joined: Sat Dec 20, 2008 11:04 am
Location: Nigeria

Re: Falling out with parents

Postby Nihal Singh Kanakpuria » Sun Feb 10, 2013 1:23 pm


You greeted the sangat here with WJKK WJKF ,I dont think i have ever greeted the sangat here with fateh , you probably have more similarity with Amritdharis than you imagine or want to accept

That being said, I usually wonder why some Indian kids call themselves rebellion for a start you are 21 still living with your parents, your college fees is probably paid by your parents, but you dont want to follow your parents rules ?, that's not called being rebellion, that's called being a typical desi ( i am desi as well, so its not to put anyone down)

In short you want to have the cake and eat it as well and since you are not able to do that , you are frustrated with the situation.

You have a few options

a) Earn a living , pay for college and live by yourself, i dont think they have locked you in the house, so you are legally free to move out (Living alone isn't as easy at seems, quite possibly you will find living with rules easier)

b) Live with your parents ,develop trust with them, slowly and steadily prove to them that you are more reliable and trust worthy than they take you to be.

Nihal Singh Kanakpuria
Power User
Posts: 745
Joined: Wed Jun 11, 2008 9:17 am

Return to Relationships

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests