Hello Everyone,
I am pretty new in my Sikhi journey, and would like some input on my situation.
My entire family is Christian. My family came to Christianity when I was in middle school. My husband and his family are born-and-raised Christians. II fit in with my family, but I do not fit in with their faith. I have studied Christianity extensively and, while I have found truth there, I have also found a lot of what feel like non-truth for me. Speaking of truth, I literally have “seek truth” tattooed on my body. It is what I have always lived for, and, in my 32 years, I have slowly learned more and more about God and truth, the type of knowing that is deep in my being. I have always struggled to find a group of people or way of life that aligns with the truth that I know. When I began studying Sikhi and reading SGGS, I felt like I was coming home. I felt truth, and I continue to feel truth as I pray and study. This is obviously exciting for me. I am challenging myself to take my time and not over-commit. My husband knows where I am at in my journey, but no one else in my family does. I fear that I will be treated differently (in a negative way) if they learn my truth.
Myself, my husband, and his mother live in a small, rural community of about 6000. The community supports itself through agriculture and the oil field. Nearly everyone is conservative Christian. There is next to no diversity here, religion or otherwise. I have a good job that I enjoy. However, my co-workers (and a great deal of other people I interact with here) are quick to speak negatively of people and/or issues that are different from what they consider normal. I do my best to educate as I am able, and fight for the fact that different does not mean bad or less, and I get frustrated sometimes.
So, as I continue on my Sikhi path, I may get to the point where I am wearing the 5 Ks, which, while a big deal and exciting step for me spiritually, would also be a really big deal and point of gossip in my community. At that point, it will be glaringly obvious that I am different from the norm in this community in which I live. Of course, I already am different. I know this. I already don’t really fit in, but I can seem like I fit in as long as I keep my mouth shut as much as possible. The only reason I fear being found out is that I don’t want to be discriminated against or harmed in any way.
For those of you who are reading and willing to share: do you find that you face discrimination for being Sikhi? How do you handle any potential discrimination or misunderstanding?
Also, does anyone have any recommendations for how to become more active in the Sikh Community when they live so far away from pretty much everything? The nearest Gurdwara is about 3 hours away and in Canada. I will be in a city next month that has a Gurdwara, so I will obviously be going there. I’m arranging to meet with someone to discuss my concerns and Sikhi in general while I am there, as well.
If anyone reading has anything to say they feel I would benefit from hearing at this point on my journey, I welcome the input.
Thank you for your consideration,
Katie